They'll find a way to get you

Conventional wisdom tells us that if someone really is motivated and wants to get you, they will.  No matter how many secret service men surround the President, an assassin intent on doing him harm will be able to do so if he is willing to pay the price.   You can make it hard but you cannot make it impossible.  Such is life for many of the powerful and famous, always looking over their shoulders, fearful some looney tune is waiting to get em. 

That hardly explains why they would get me though.  While my smell is sometimes powerful and I am somewhat famous in some parts for my temper, I never thought I was much of a target for anyone.  I just stay under the radar.  Or so I thought.

People who know me, know that I do not own any Apple products.  As an investor I have admired their model and how they've made money hand over fist.  I admired their innovations, how they set the standards for others to catch up to.  But I also admired how they locked people in to their own closed system with their products forcing people to buy everything from them.  They made sure they provided excellent service but when you bought a product from them, you went to them for anything else you wanted be it music, downloads, etc.  And boy did the sheeple keep buying.  In 2003 you could buy Apple stock for $7 a share.  When the markets crashed in 2008-09, you could get shares for $85.  But in 2012 their stock price reached $700 a share and the company was valued higher than any other company in the world. 

I've watched all this and been told by friends and coworkers how much they loved their Apple Iphone or Ipad etc but I would not buy.  I would not be enthralled to the I tunes store or be standing in line outside my local Apple store for days when a new product was about to come out.  Not me.  They weren't ever gonna get me as my money was staying right in my pocket.  I'll buy an Android phone, hell I'll get a Blackberry or a Windows phone if necessary but I'll never buy an Iphone.  And what use do I have for an Ipad?  I have a desktop and a laptop.  I don't tweet, I don't facebook and I'm not linked in.  So I had no use for an Apple.  We just went on ignoring each other.  Or so I thought.

Those sneaky bastards at Apple finally got to me.  They figured out my weakness and they exploited it.  They knew how much I enjoyed trivia and such and they turned my love against me.   There is a website called The Pioneer Woman - you can view it here.  She has a cooking show on the Food network and I've made and enjoyed a few of her recipes very much.  She taught me how to make country gravy.  And she does trivia quizzes from time to time on her website.   Last Saturday I participated in an online movie trivia quiz on her site.  Movies from the 80s.  Apparently I saw a lot of movies in the 80s.  I breezed through the quiz and scored 100 on it.  And I was the first one to do that.  Well the first person to score 100 on this quiz got one of these

Have some candy little boy

 

Late this afternoon UPS came knocking on my door and dropped off 32GB of Apple's finest.  I admit it, I am taken by it.  The simplicity, the sensitivity of the touch screen.  Hell it even has Siri.  I held off on asking her "What does Marcellus Wallace look like?".   How hilarious would that Iphone commercial have been if Samuel L Jackson had asked Siri that?  The PQ and I have oohed and aahed over it since it arrived.  We even visited the App store and downloaded a couple of games, freebies folks.  The Borg have not sunk their tentacles that deeply into me yet.  But I fear it's only a matter of time. 

 

So if you're stopped at a red light some day soon in Florida or maybe Vegas and you see a poor soul holding a sign on the side of the road saying "Will work for Apps", have mercy on the poor sucker and drop him a couple of bucks or some spare change.  Its not his fault, they got to him too. 

 

One final word, I have come to the following conclusion.  Ipads won are much sweeter than Ipads bought and paid for.  Stay lucky folks, maybe the evil empire will get you too.