Book em Dano

50 already? Seems like only a month ago I was 25, with a baby boy and another on the way. Now both boys live in their own apartment and have good jobs and girl friends. Feels like it was a couple of weeks ago when my little girl was born. Now she's almost 18 and getting ready to go off to college. Lately I have found myself thinking of all this deep shit like what does it all mean, what do I want to do with the rest of my life, have I prepared my kids for their future, and will OJ have better luck finding Nicole's killer in jail than he did on the golf course. It boggles the mind sometimes.

Do I feel like a success when I look back at my life? What have I really done? Have I achieved anything?? Most times my answer is not really. Yet I have managed to help raise 3 good kids who are (mostly) productive members of society. Most of the credit goes to their mother but I haven't been a complete dud I guess. Maybe I should have that put on my tombstone "He wasn't a complete dud". I know I'll never be famous except by accident like from winning the lottery or something. When you come right down to it, I don't want to be famous anyway. I wouldn't mind being rich however. Enough of this maudlin bullshit anyway.

Still it's my birthday. 50 years ago today my mother was probably laying back in the Providence Lying In Hospital thinking "Thank God that's over". So how should I celebrate? It won't be playing poker that's for sure. My luck lately has been as poor as I've seen. I can't make a hand stand up and anyone calling me on a draw is just about guaranteed to hit it. I hit a set on the turn one hand and there were 2 cards to the flush as well on board though no straight draw. With 1300 in the pot I pushed all in for 2300 to make sure I don't give any flush draw the odds to draw to it. I still get called and the guy hits the river. 7 outs but of course it hits. He's getting about 1.5 to 1 odds to draw to his draw. His odds of winning the hand are about 5 to 1 against. That's the way the odds are working today. Last hand I have both open end straight and flush draws and the river is nothing. Again. So poker is done for the rest of the day for me. I don't need this aggravation on my birthday.

Gonna hit the library and spend some time with a few good books, have dinner with the wife and kiddies, pop open a bottle of wine and have a bit of cake and ice cream as well. A good day to relax and spend family time. I hope all of you have a good weekend. Take a little time to tell some older friend or relative what they mean to you today. Cuz they won't always be around you know. You might make their day. Stay lucky you nuts.